The Men’s Group

Here is the group description for The Men’s Group on Facebook, included here to outline the values brought to my men’s work.


~ There are many ways to be a man ~

“To be nobody but myself – in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me somebody else – means to fight the hardest battle any human can fight, and never stop fighting.”
~ E. E. Cummings

This group is a men’s only group. It is a place where together, we will delve into our personal issues, problems, triumphs, etc.. as deeply experiencing men who have moved beyond, and want to expand, the traditional ways men have lived thus far. As such, it is not a “Men’s Rights Activists” group.

Anyone can post in this group or add members. Feel free to add anyone who you think may benefit and/or contribute.
No political posts or comments will be accepted, nor expressions of political stance.
Spiritual/ Religious posts and comments are only welcome as they are directly, clearly and strongly related to men’s issues.
Otherwise, political and spiritual posts and comments will be deleted.

Group Rule: What happens here stays here. While you can discuss your own experiences in the group, avoid any information that might identify another man, e.g., name, location, or attributes that might reveal identity. It may be a good thing to share some of what you experience here with your closest/intimate friends/partners. Nonetheless, even there, you can keep this group the safest place it can be, and this is a good way to practice boundaries and to lend strength and value to the group.

Everyone’s ideas about what men need to be our fullest and most fulfilled selves are welcome. Two of the basic values that will recur in this group are vulnerability and emotional facility, which have been deprived most men in our conditioning. So, think back about the messages you got about being vulnerable and emotional, how you got them, and if you like, share them here. A third basic value is connection and support, and that is what this group is for.

A fourth basic value for this group is our personal empowerment: Not power over, as tyrants, but power with one another. The principles of this group are designed to support increased authenticity, which is the source of personal power and alignment. As such, the spirit of this group is one of personal courage and strength in our vulnerability and emotions, while supporting others. It is likely that we have intended to use power in positive ways. Also, in the discussions we could separate the sort of entitled power bestowed by the patriarchy, from what feels like power that is genuine, deeper, personal and transpersonal or archetypal, and emerges from the authentic self, again, balanced with and informed by self-aware vulnerability that adds to our compassion.

This group adheres to a “no man left behind” policy. We will all move forward and liberate ourselves together. There will not be a shunning of any man for making a mistake or behaving in this or that way. In the past, at least one man left the group, but he returned, another who was aggressive and shaming, presenting the toxic masculine, did not return of his own choice. It is believed that we can all learn together and must learn to support one another through whatever arises from each individual. While it is encouraged to lead off and follow through any interaction with vulnerability, sometimes conflicts will arise. That said, any chronic and repeated patterns of disruption to the group principles could result in a temporary removal from the group. If things are again repeated, removal may last longer. By following the principles in the group description, no man will be left behind.

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